I swear... Everyday is such a struggle for me..just to get through the smallest task..nothing in my life comes easy... (this is very stressful on my mind,heart and soul) I feel like my long terms goals are going to fall short and I'll end up in a place I don't wanna be..
With school..
I'm struggling in one class and not fully understanding what the hell is happening in the other..So I'm spending my Saturdays studying rather than going out shopping..damn..but now i see why so many people don't finish school...but I have to finish..cause i already f'ed up once..so this time I really gotta finish..
Love life..
Non-existent.. at this current time...It would feel good to have love at this time though,
especially when the weather gets nice and you could just go out and chill in the nice weather with
a significant other...but for me that's just going to be a fantasy because I don't see myself being in
a committed relationship within the next couple of years..I've set my standards high where I'm
not wasting my time with bs..If u wanna be with me, then you gotta be in it for the long run...
(that's why i said years from now...lol)
Myself in general
Half of me is just grateful to just be alive and able to write a "blog" and the other half is unhappy
with then way things are in my life.. There's nothing I could do the change my situation unless I
make an ultimate sacrifice and take a horrible risk just to seek some type of relief..but ima have
to wade this point and time in my life out right now.. ("good things come to those who wait")
On a scale 1-10.. on the inside a 4.. on the outside a 7.5
In conclusion
Just know that I'm not suffering from depression..but just may be alittle depressed at times..
but that doesn't mean I need to take Abilify,Zoloft,Effexor,Cymbalta,Lexapro,Prozac,or Paxil...lol
(patients at my job be taking all those anti depressants!.lol)
just to get through this rough patch..
I just have alot of praying to do..that's all..
~Didi
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